The emotional turmoil...

     Away from college, I didn't ever realise how much perplexity in emotions it may lead to. It is like staying at home yet staying away from a place where you had made so many friends and acquaintances over the year you had spent there. You had thought that this would be the best  time one could have spent, the time when one  gets back to family and old friends after a long span of months. It is indeed hurtful to find that your parents can actually catch the boredom in your eyes when you move about lazily in your own house, wondering about things that have happened in the past, and whenever you sit beside them you blabber about the events you experienced in the one year you spent at University. They are glad to see that you have become matured enough to handle various circumstances having got to make new friends, having gone through the pain of broken friendships and even having known how the society has its own ways of dealing with situations.

    

     However, whenever you chat with friends over the net, the same pangs of the cusp of adolescence and adulthood come to front when they ask you the questions whether you have been missing their company or those boring lectures you were happy to be relieved from in case the Professor was absent. For me, I sit at my computer for hours, not realising the fact that there are people I need to attend upon, people who have waited long enough for my arrival back home, the ones who have longed for my presence so that they could share their thoughts, those small family issues and those tiny cropped up feelings with me. I didn't realise that sitting for hours on the net, listening to music or watching television could be bothersome for them unless I was scolded for it a couple of times. "It is kind of funny how life can change", I remember those lines from 'The Blues' but then seems that somehow I can't help it. There is this emotional turmoil in the mind where there is a phase which asks you to be available to your family back there but then whenever the phase of having entered the college becomes dominant, one is reminded of the variety of emotions developed which at times you are reluctant to share with anyone. You want to connect with your school friends but then at the same time you can't refrain from staying connected with your newly made connections at University level. There is a feeling of getting back to school to see your teachers who have nurtured you well enough to reach your present position but then the Professors you have been regularly updating your parents about can't keep you from thinking about your batchmates and those lectures at college.

     Moreover you have the urge as well as responsibility to find suitable internships and courses you can opt for in future or perhaps to enhance your present skills. At the same time there are friends who are always there for your assistance and long for your company at the time you're there in town and a queue of aspiring juniours who are likely to look up to you for guidance. So, as for this time period, it is the delicate balance one has to maintain between both family and college life, coping with your mood swings in a way such that they prove to be subtle in both cases as far as your young and rough interaction with batchmates is concerned and your soft exchange of words with family is taken into consideration.